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Bad Translations


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#91
aidenpons

Well, I watched the definition of Bad Translations, and I decided to dump everything he said into it. :P

 


Original text:

"I would not like to buy this record: it is scratched."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Washington CD (fig. a)."

 


Original text:

"I would not like to buy this tobacco: it is scratched."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The relationship between cigarette smoking: the original"

 


Original text:

"My hover craft is full of eels."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Industrial pipes."

 


Original text:

"Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Enflatab home"

 


Original text:

"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Meat holes."

 


Original text:

"I am no longer infected."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Form."

 


Original text:

"You have beautiful eyes."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... Well for me. .."

 


Original text:

"Drop your panties Sir William, I cannot wait until lunchtime."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Panties, Sir William, and packaging."

 


Original text:

"My nipples explode with delight!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"It was a mistake )."

 

Where the heck did that bracket come from? :P (It totally wasn't Haitian Creole, of course not :P)


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#92
Shadowblaze

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Original text:

 

"Meat holes. Haha."

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"ChaCha Rod body"

 

Uhm, what?

 

 

 

Original text:

 

"Mad Pain Points are the new type of font-punishment."

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"Pain is the new generation of stupidity"

 

Bad Translator's words of wisdom.

 

 

 

Original text:

 

"All hail Cutesy."

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"James"

 

:o This is very peculiar. Cutesy was made by jamesster, weird.


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#93
Quisoves Pugnat

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I normally use Bing on Bad Translator, so needless to say I was taken aback by how much more incompetent Transperfect manages to be in only nine random translations.

 

 

"Are you ready to translate?"

becomes "Bersetzen?"

 

And then "It is an ancient mariner, and he stoppeth one of three." gets us

" H, trjcy stoppeth. "

 

And here's the clincher:

Original text:

"How should you like to go up in a swing, up in the air so high?"

...9 translations later, TransPerfect gives us:

" Nasl havann energa aufwrts neeli yksekte? "

 

And here's its bizarre path:

Spoiler

 

Transperfect, my foot.


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#94
noghiri

Ahh, I just rediscovered this... which made me think of here.

 

Original text:

"Why am I wearing socks?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"This is not the reason."

 

Original text:

"I wonder if I exist? Everything tastes funny."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Note that if you have the time? I was very happy."

 

I... guess I was very happy... but is that really not the reason?


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#95
Shadowblaze

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Original text:

 

"I am making a fancy secret project, of which a lot of people know about."

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"Many of them are in the article."

 

Yep. But the path is better.

 

Spoiler

 

Budget submitting articles? :lol:

 

 

 

Original text:

 

"Are you leady to re?"

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"One way is not good."

 

:S

 

 

 

Original text:

 

"Why does my new video have only seventeen views? Timface."

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"There is a new version of page 17 of Tymf."

 

Okay, so, Tymf is like a book or something, and there's a new version of page 17?


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#96
Quisoves Pugnat

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Let's see how Bad Translator, by way of Bing, takes King Lear.

 

Original text:

"How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Pay to get rid of the snakes because of toothache."

 

As well as "As Mao's teeth ungrateful daughter lighter?"

And "Children are clearly due to the Snake's mouth."

The last one has an interesting path:

Spoiler


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#97
aidenpons

"Rock Raiders United!"

--> (becomes)

"Pirate Unit PCs"

-->

"Copyright infringment"

-->

"Damage"

-->

"There is nothing wrong with that"

-->

"Something is going on here"

-->

"What the hell is going on here" (I don't mean to swear here but that's what it said :o )*

-->

"...This is the underworld"

-->

"...It's the Metro"

-->

"Underground railroad"

-->

"In March, the public transport system."

-->

"In March, Traffic and Trust."

-->

"3 month traffic jam and credibility."

-->

"3 months of light and faith."

-->

"3 months later, depending on the hop."

-->

"When planning for three months."

 

 

RRU: 3 months of light and faith. :P

oh no I just gave Cyrem another April Fools idea, didn't I...

 

 

I can assure you that Haitian Creole was certainly involved here. :P

 

*Ok, who borked up the smilies. :o is the one I want, but it would appear that o) takes precedence. Gah.


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#98
Shadowblaze

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Original text:

 

"RRU: 3 months of light and faith, with the Mad Pain Points based Font-Punishment!"

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"Q: I smelled blood and pain in the prison."

 

A: That's not a question. And that statement sounds interestingly accurate to reality.

 

The path (with all the repetitions cut):

 

Spoiler

 

This path is very interesting, it changes a lot with every translation. I wanted to cut more parts, but there are too many changes and fun stuff. RRF? Rock Raider Federation? And what's that "K:"? :P

 

 

 

Man, there is so much stuff to point out in this path. I decided to comment on the ones I thought were the funniest.

 

"Line-crazy pain punishment". More interesting punishments by Bad Translator! Actually, "Line-crazy" reminds me of something like "wicked". A weird, slangy, adjective. We should start using that now!

 

"Financial regulations: light and faith, the anger, the pain of prison, 3 times.". In Rock Raiders Federation Ltd., as a financial regulation the workers have to have faith and see the light, then be mad at something, and as a consequence go in jail, and feel the pain of being in prison. All this for three times. This sounds like a weird financial regulation. The director of this company must be an Insane Raider or something.


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#99
Quisoves Pugnat

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Bad Translator and I are on good terms once more:

Original text:

"For some unfathomable reason, Bad Translator now refuses to yield me a terribly interesting (bad) translation. I hope it mends its ways."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"This tradition is an abridged version of this UNITED STATES Administration (not good), how can you tell? I hope to travel or not."

 

And here's the path:

Spoiler

 


And Bad Translator takes part of a nursery rhyme and gives us what seems  like a strange attempt at poetry:

 

" This is the maiden all forlorn, that milked the cow with the crumpled horn, that tossed the dog that worried the cat, that chased the rat that ate the cheese,that lay in the house that Jack built. "

...6 translations later, SDL gives us:

"This is the unique woman all hopeless one, that the cow pressed the horn blow with the full of one, that the dog shot down, that the interested cats become are, that more went the mouse, than a cheese ate, that regulated to the house, that constructed jacket. "


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#100
Seaborgium

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"Rock Raiders United!"

--> (becomes)

"Pirate Unit PCs"

-->

"Copyright infringment"

-->

"Damage"

-->

"There is nothing wrong with that"

-->

"Something is going on here"

-->

"What the hell is going on here" (I don't mean to swear here but that's what it said :o )*

-->

"...This is the underworld"

-->

"...It's the Metro"

-->

"Underground railroad"

-->

"In March, the public transport system."

-->

"In March, Traffic and Trust."

-->

"3 month traffic jam and credibility."

-->

"3 months of light and faith."

-->

"3 months later, depending on the hop."

-->

"When planning for three months."

 

 

RRU: 3 months of light and faith. :P

oh no I just gave Cyrem another April Fools idea, didn't I...

 

 

I can assure you that Haitian Creole was certainly involved here. :P

 

*Ok, who borked up the smilies. :o is the one I want, but it would appear that o) takes precedence. Gah.

This is quite possibly the best Bad Translation ever :P



#101
Shadowblaze

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Original text:

 

"A slimy slug is invading your base!"

 

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

 

"Stryker Omar"

 

:S

 

Wanna see the path? It's pretty interesting.

 

Spoiler

 

I love this path.

 

"Barnacle from intruders". The word "barnacle" has now become a verb! "Hey, do you wanna barnacle from the city?" "Yes, that would be line-crazy!"

 

"Lobster leg rank of intruders". These intruders have been now ranked Lobster Leg. Lobster Leg rank. :P

 

"Invaders from the foot of lobster" "Invaders from the foot of Omar". Wait, how did "lobster" turn into "Omar"?

 

"Omar at the foot of the Stryker" "Stryker at the foot of Omar". What, why did they just switch places?


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#102
Ben24x7

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I actually think I got at least a decent translation. Here:

 

I began with "I AM NOT A MORON"

...35 translations later..

"I'm not a fool"

 

Here is all the in-betweens (Warning, Large list):

 

Spoiler

 

After that I tried again but with the sentance "When you're dead I will be still alive"

...35 translations later...

"Spirit of joy mirsite there"

 

...Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

 

Right, all the in-betweens, long list, blah blah blah:

 

Spoiler



#103
legosponge

Original text:

"THIS. IS. MINECRAFT!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"In the morning!"


Original text:

"SPONGEEBOBBLE!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"By SPONGEEBOBBL"

 

...okay.


Original text:

"If you select the green brick-"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The cube is selected"

SO THAT'S WHAT THE GREEN BRICK DOES!


Original text:

"I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE... A CACTUS!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Open your eyes and look at the Cactus"